Thinking of you not existing makes me want to masturbate.ģ6. Come to think of it, your face is old, too.ģ5. Is that a scar on your face? My bad, it’s just your mouth.ģ1. How much do you charge to deliver an STD?ģ0. I don’t know how you do it, but after a shower, you look even greasier.Ģ9. Some people may have thyroid problems, but I can tell you’re fat because you’re lazy.Ģ8. Hey, where’d you get that nose? It’s a “before” picture in one of those plastic surgery magazines, isn’t it?Ģ7. I thought I had the flu, but then I realized your face makes me sick to my stomach.Ģ6. That’s why I’m rooting for your penis.Ģ5. You sure have a bodacious rack-for a guy.Ģ4. Nasty comebacks don’t require a lot of wit instead, these will land your target flat on their back and wallowing in self pity.Ģ2. I’d sue my parents if I had a face like yours. Was that comment meant to offend me? The only thing offending me right now is your face.ġ8. Just because you have a dick doesn’t mean you need to act like one.ġ7. They used to call them “jumpolines,” until your mom jumped on one.ġ6. You’ll never be even half the man your mother is.ġ5. Is your family tree a cactus? No? That’s funny, because everyone on it is a prick.ġ4. However, I don’t recall anything about morons.ġ3. Scientists say the universe is made up of electrons, protons, and neutrons. Your lips are moving, but all I hear is “blah, blah, blah.”ġ2. Why is it OK for you to be an idiot, but not OK for me to point it out?ġ0. It looks like your face caught fire and someone tried to put it out with a baseball bat.ĩ. I’d love to see things from your perspective, but it’s almost impossible to get my head up your ass that far.Ĩ. I’ve seen your kind before… but last time, I had to pay admission.ħ. Your hair looks great! How do you get it to curl out of your nostrils like that?Ħ. I’d love to give you a nasty look, but it appears you already have one.ĥ. If you’re going to be two-faced, you could at least make one of them pretty.Ĥ. The only way you’ll ever get laid is if you crawl up a chicken’s butt and wait.ģ. If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world.Ģ. These comebacks are best for those situations where you don’t just want to insult someone-you want to own the room.ġ. Witty comebacks that show off the smarty pants in you Good comebacks that are so savage they burn!Įver wanted to be the wise-ass who always has a comeback for everything? Now you can be! All you have to do is save this page, or commit to memory some of our favorite insults from the following list, and you’ll be all set. Rather than kicking yourself later when you think of something clever you should have said, keep a few witty insults and comebacks at the ready, just in case.Īnd trust us, once you use these lines, everyone will be ooh-ing to your snarky comments the next time someone dares to make fun of you! This collection of top ten comebacks will give you a few great zingers to keep in mind next time someone in your life crosses the line or your personal boundaries.Do you ever find yourself getting annoyed with yourself because you just thought of an awesomely good comeback to something someone said earlier? Damn, now why didn’t you think of it earlier?! The next time the cat gets your tongue, here’s a big list of good, witty, nasty, funny sarcastic and clever comebacks for every conversation, no matter where you are! We all have to deal with crazy family, nosy individuals or people who offer up unsolicited advice.
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